AGING BABY BOOMERS REMARRY
Many formerly divorced and widowed Baby Boomers are in second (third, fourth ...) marriages. The status of these unions runs the gamut from divine to debacle. Predictably, varied reasons are cited as causes for disparate results.
One of the major reasons for divine second marriages is supportive families and friends who root for these relationships to flourish and graciously welcome new mates into their social circles. Yay!
In contrast, one of the major reasons for doomed second marriages is family, mostly offspring from previous unions, who pump up tension by denouncing our new mates and undermining our new marriages.
Boomers expect a bit of opposition from still-living-at-home youngsters who are directly affected by household changes. We are blindsided when serious opposition comes from our independent adult children, particularly if they have spouses and children of their own and/or live far away and rarely visit us.
In worst-case scenarios, unrelenting family pressures tear apart nascent marital bonds. Boo!
NOTE
Baby Boomer second marriages have higher success rates when spouses pledge to be cordial to each other's children and to MYOB (mind your own business). Patience, patience, and more patience.
Not surprisingly, lots of boomers tell adult children to MTOB (mind their own business). Good luck with that.
STAY TUNED
Are Boomers Willing To Compromise ...
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Showing posts with label weddings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weddings. Show all posts
Thursday, July 26, 2018
Thursday, July 19, 2018
AGING BABY BOOMERS SHATTER DATING & MARRIAGE TRADITIONS
WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #42
AGING BABY BOOMERS SHATTER DATING AND MARRIAGE TRADITIONS
Long, long ago when first-wave Baby Boomers learned relationship ground rules, girls were coached to date and marry up. This was construed as women should set our sights on men who were not only older but also taller, more educated, had 'superior' career status and higher salaries. In hindsight, it is appalling that most of us didn't challenge with: 'Stop the nonsense. If women focus up, does it not imply that men should aim their focus down? Hindsight!!!
Historically, a minority of women did date and marry younger men. The significant increase in these relationships has been credited to midpoint boomers who were instrumental in toppling gender-based age-boundaries. One outcome - insulting to some, a badge of honor to others - older women are labeled: 'cougars;' younger men are: 'cubs.'
By the way: Midpointers also played a huge role in smashing gender-based disparities in education and career opportunities, and more. Impressive accomplishments.
Last-wave boomers have disregarded just about all dating, relationship, marriage traditions. In this, and other ways, last-wavers have made substantial contributions to 'The Baby Boomer Catalogue of Rebellious Acts' .
NOTE
Anecdotal evidence suggests that age discrepancies also exist in homosexual relationships. Up-to-date comprehensive empirical research on this topic, as well as overall LBGT dating patterns, is needed.
STAY TUNED
Boomers Remarry ...
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
BLOG #42
AGING BABY BOOMERS SHATTER DATING AND MARRIAGE TRADITIONS
Long, long ago when first-wave Baby Boomers learned relationship ground rules, girls were coached to date and marry up. This was construed as women should set our sights on men who were not only older but also taller, more educated, had 'superior' career status and higher salaries. In hindsight, it is appalling that most of us didn't challenge with: 'Stop the nonsense. If women focus up, does it not imply that men should aim their focus down? Hindsight!!!
Historically, a minority of women did date and marry younger men. The significant increase in these relationships has been credited to midpoint boomers who were instrumental in toppling gender-based age-boundaries. One outcome - insulting to some, a badge of honor to others - older women are labeled: 'cougars;' younger men are: 'cubs.'
By the way: Midpointers also played a huge role in smashing gender-based disparities in education and career opportunities, and more. Impressive accomplishments.
Last-wave boomers have disregarded just about all dating, relationship, marriage traditions. In this, and other ways, last-wavers have made substantial contributions to 'The Baby Boomer Catalogue of Rebellious Acts' .
NOTE
Anecdotal evidence suggests that age discrepancies also exist in homosexual relationships. Up-to-date comprehensive empirical research on this topic, as well as overall LBGT dating patterns, is needed.
STAY TUNED
Boomers Remarry ...
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Thursday, March 8, 2018
WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #24
AGING BABY BOOMERS GO ON BLIND DATES
Countless Baby Boomers met (and meet) spouses on blind dates.
Hopeful single boomers go on blind dates wishing for similar results.
Others go just for fun.
Then again, numerous boomers have given up on blind dates after one too many disappointing matches to incompatible people.
Rather than give up, let's unravel blind date failures from another angle - the matchmaker angle. Generally speaking, we regularly and mistakenly assume all matchmakers respect our likes and dislikes; they arrange dates accordingly.
In effect, matchmakers are comparable to gift givers. Ideal gift givers hand out presents that suit recipients' tastes, not theirs. In contrast, lousy gift givers hand out presents that suit their tastes, not the recipients. If we substitute matchmakers with gift givers, their roles in successful or botched blind dates are evident. Choose wisely.
NOTE
Baby Boomers wonder whether lousy matchmakers vicariously live out their personal fantasies when they arrange dates. That is, do matchmakers choose whom they would date ... if they could?
STAY TUNED
Boomers Blind Date Nightmares ...
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos
BLOG #24
AGING BABY BOOMERS GO ON BLIND DATES
Countless Baby Boomers met (and meet) spouses on blind dates.
Hopeful single boomers go on blind dates wishing for similar results.
Others go just for fun.
Then again, numerous boomers have given up on blind dates after one too many disappointing matches to incompatible people.
Rather than give up, let's unravel blind date failures from another angle - the matchmaker angle. Generally speaking, we regularly and mistakenly assume all matchmakers respect our likes and dislikes; they arrange dates accordingly.
In effect, matchmakers are comparable to gift givers. Ideal gift givers hand out presents that suit recipients' tastes, not theirs. In contrast, lousy gift givers hand out presents that suit their tastes, not the recipients. If we substitute matchmakers with gift givers, their roles in successful or botched blind dates are evident. Choose wisely.
NOTE
Baby Boomers wonder whether lousy matchmakers vicariously live out their personal fantasies when they arrange dates. That is, do matchmakers choose whom they would date ... if they could?
STAY TUNED
Boomers Blind Date Nightmares ...
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email: drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook: facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos
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