Thursday, April 19, 2018

UNHAPPILY-MARRIED AGING BABY BOOMERS

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #30
UNHAPPILY-MARRIED AGING BABY BOOMERS

It's not a news flash to report that countless Baby Boomers are in unhappy, unfulfilling marriages.
It is informative, though, to report the main factors that induce boomers to remain married ... unhappily ever after.

Standard Justifications: Children still live at home, financial concerns, religious beliefs, wedding vows are sacred, et al.

A Prevalent Excuse: Aging boomers are too set in our ways to disrupt familiar lifestyles. Long-time couples stay married to avoid the difficult adjustments that follow breakups. In other words, inertia has set in.

A Deep-Seated and Often Unacknowledged Reason: The fear of being alone.

NOTE
The Paradox: Baby Boomers (and others) who are convinced that being in relationships is preferable to being alone, complain they feel alone and lonely in those relationships.

STAY TUNED
Boomers Think Forever Is Too Long ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:              drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:        facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos 

Thursday, April 12, 2018

HAVE LONG-MARRIED BABY BOOMERS LOST THEIR SIZZLE?

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #29
HAVE LONG-MARRIED BABY BOOMERS LOST THEIR SIZZLE?

Are long-married couples romantically intimate? Maybe.
Can faded marital passion be rejuvenated? Possibly.
Does your passion-battery need to be recharged? Uhhhh...perhaps.

Typically, first-wave and midpoint married boomers are either done with, or winding down from, the time and energy-consuming distractions that dampened the sizzling flames of our young marriages - building families and careers. Now if we choose, older healthy boomers are able to commit time and energy to reignite our passion. Yes. It is a choice.

Conversely, most last-wave married boomers are in the midst of hectic, busy lives, i.e. demanding careers, children living at home, elderly parents needing care, et cetera. Naturally, these responsibilities stifle amorous activities - to what extent is also a choice.

NOTE
Needless to say, multiple issues other than distractions factor into Baby Boomers' diminished marital passion and subsequent choices.

STAY TUNED
Unhappily Married Boomers ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:               drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:         facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos


Thursday, April 5, 2018

LONG-MARRIED BABY BOOMERS

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #28
LONG-MARRIED BABY BOOMERS

Congratulations to Baby Boomers who have long-standing marriages. In fact, a number of first-wave boomers have celebrated, or are about to celebrate, 50-year golden anniversaries. Wow!

We all are aware that a combination of love, friendship, and laughter are keys to successful marriages. And, we all are impressed if spouses support and respect each other, as well as share common values, interests, and goals.

Boomers give high praise - albeit with a tad of disbelief, a bit of curiosity, and a tinge of envy - to 50-year couples who say they continue to be attracted to, charmed by, and intimate with, each other.

NOTE
In fantasyland, long-married couples live in love-filled, compatible harmony. 
In realville, ... well, you know.

STAY TUNED
Romantic Married Boomers ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:             drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:       facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos

Thursday, March 29, 2018

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #27
DATING WHILE EMPTY NESTING, AGING BABY BOOMER STYLE

When adult children leave home to live on their own, Baby Boomers don't immediately celebrate. We usually go through a period of adjustment (mere minutes to few months) before fully enjoying the benefits of empty nests - especially regained privacy and independence.

Single empty nesters appreciate the ability to date and cultivate romantic relationships, free from prying eyes watching our every move. Ummmm ... except if your adult children feel it is their right to meddle and voice opinions, even from afar.

The fiercest responses to meddlesome offspring are summed up by a boomer who unequivocally stated, 'My love-life is none of my children's business and I won't ask their permission to have one.' Definitely fierce.

On the other end of the spectrum are boomers who surrender control to their children, summed up by an empty nester who wept, 'Sure I would like a bit of romance and companionship, but I ended a relationship and gave up dating because it upset my overly protective kids.' Overly protective, or selfish, or ???

Then there are Baby Boomers who reawaken rebellious teenage skills in order to hide forbidden dates. One boomer-teen's justification, 'Sneaking around and having taboo trysts add spicy elements to dating.' Really?

NOTE
Why would grown-up offspring deny their parents the joys of romance and companionship? And, why would Baby Boomer parents allow our children to treat us as if we are the children? Why indeed!

STAY TUNED
Long-married boomers ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:           drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:     facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos




Thursday, March 22, 2018

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #26
DATING WHILE PARENTING, AGING BABY BOOMER STYLE

How do last-wave Baby Boomer singles - with youngsters still living at home - find free time for dating and romance? HaHaHa...

Fortunate boomers have families that provide backup. Singles arrange dates to coincide with children's sleepovers at the homes of either the other parents or willing grandparents, aunts, et al. It's a great arrangement - if family members are readily available, actually willing, and truly present in the children's lives. More importantly, if the kids are safe and comfortable.

A practical solution works well for those with or without families. Singles set up sleepover exchanges with a couple of trustworthy single-parent friends or neighbors. 'You take my kids one night and I'll take your kids another night.' It's a good arrangement - if the kids get along (and there's not too many of them). And again, if they are safe and comfortable.

NOTE
Yep.   Both plans forgo spontaneity and ration dating sprees.
Nope. There are no easy or convenient solutions - but as we all know, parenting is not easy or convenient.

STAY TUNED
Empty Nests, Dating, And Aging Boomers 

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:        drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:  facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos

Thursday, March 15, 2018

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #25
AGING BABY BOOMERS HAVE BLIND-DATE NIGHTMARES

Nightmarish blind dates can happen to singles of all ages. A particularly wicked one looms for aging Baby Boomers.

This nightmare unfolds as soon as we catch glimpses of our matches. Not because they are unattractive or unpleasant. It is because they resemble ... our grandparents.

Throughout the date we're distracted by internal chattering, 'Why would our matchmakers think we would be romantically interested in anyone sooooo old?' And, 'Do those setting up the dates see us as that old?' How absurd!

NOTE
The nightmare reaches an appalling climax when Baby Boomers wonder, 'Are our dates' internal chatterings focused on how old we look?' Oh the horrors!!!

STAY TUNED
Dating While Parenting ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:        drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:  facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos



                                                       

Thursday, March 8, 2018

WELCOME TO BABY BOOMER MEMOS
BLOG #24
AGING BABY BOOMERS GO ON BLIND DATES


Countless Baby Boomers met (and meet) spouses on blind dates.
Hopeful single boomers go on blind dates wishing for similar results.
Others go just for fun. 

Then again, numerous boomers have given up on blind dates after one too many disappointing matches to incompatible people.  

Rather than give up, let's unravel blind date failures from another angle - the matchmaker angle. Generally speaking, we regularly and mistakenly assume all matchmakers respect our likes and dislikes; they arrange dates accordingly.

In effect, matchmakers are comparable to gift givers. Ideal gift givers hand out presents that suit recipients' tastes, not theirs. In contrast, lousy gift givers hand out presents that suit their tastes, not the recipients. If we substitute matchmakers with gift givers, their roles in successful or botched blind dates are evident. Choose wisely.

NOTE
Baby Boomers wonder whether lousy matchmakers vicariously live out their personal fantasies when they arrange dates. That is, do matchmakers choose whom they would date ... if they could?

STAY TUNED
Boomers Blind Date Nightmares ...

CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:         drwendykyman@gmail.com
Facebook:   facebook.com/Baby Boomer Memos